Brought to you by the letters 1 and 7

Maybe it's because of the lack of sleep, maybe it's my hatred of James Patterson. Maybe, just maybe, it's purely my love for The Count, but this picture makes me giddy. 

As today's post is brought to you by the letters 1 and 7, it gave me an excuse to share. :)

1 plus 7 is the number of nights we haven't slept longer than a 2.5 hour chunk. How we long for the 6 and 2 hour nights again; did we really complain? 

Take two ones, place them side by side and you've got the number of nights Penelope has woken every hour, one the hour. (That's 11 by the way)

7 and 1 brings us to Baby brainz moment #71 - being unable to properly write coherently to tell you about this adventure in sleep deprivation we're having.

I'm starting to consider a night nanny. Penelope sleep update coming soon.

#22

Baby Brainz moment #22 - trying to pump milk without the breast shield on. It took me a moment to realize why there wasn't any suction. 

Strollercapades

I woke up this morning to sunshine and, having finally slept more than 2 hours, a smile. I figured it was a beautiful morning so driving to yoga was out of the question. I got both P and myself bundled up to brace the wind. I was pumped. We were both layered and warm despite the cold and I figure walking in the sun would make it even more lovely of a morning.

dot. dot. dot.

Have you ever walked on Kingston's sidewalks? Now, if you know me, you know I love me some City of Kingston employees ;) but I swear the City has never heard of sidewalk snow removal. I was trekking along when pavement suddenly transformed to ice rink. As I was holding on to the stroller for balance for the 19th time, I started thinking, there's gotta be someone dressed as a giant children's character on skates somewhere and looking over my shoulder for Miss Piggy. Mickey? Smurfs? Cinda&#%@rella? (That was for those of us who grew up with Pretty Woman.) 

I thought just for a moment that maybe I had been sucked into some warped dimension where strollercapades had become the latest form of entertainment. Is some guy going to come over a loud speaker booming, "And featured at the corner of Barrie aaaaand Princess, Theeee Ladeeee Penelopeeeee!!!"? Am I going to come across Sophie the Giraffe doing a triple axle?

Welcome to Strollers on Ice.

It got to the point where it was taking so much effort not slipping, and strength to push the stroller through and over patches of frozen slush and patches of ice that I ended up just walking in the road. So, rather than just rant about the City's lack of sidewalk snow removal I started thinking about ideas on how to deal as I walked home. TADA! The following was born. (Thanks to a fellow blogger for the thermos idea!) 

1. Having a bunch of stuff in the basket of the stroller to help weigh it down should help with traction. 
2. Fill a large thermos with boiling salted water instead of coffee. I know what you`re thinking: SACRILEGIOUS! But, as someone else has pointed out to me, you can use the water to clear the path if or when you get stuck. This is a good thing. Plus you now have an excuse to stop for a latte on your journey.
3. Spray heavily salted water on your stroller wheels.
4. Invest in a pair of ice cleats. I got a pair last year when I was pregnant, for fear of falling and they work really well. You can get them at MEC, or in the city at Trailhead. Guess I should dig those out of storage tonight.

If you have any suggestions please share, with the winter weather just starting, they can only help. Walk safely.

Mombies Unite

I guess it's what I get for calling the blog "Baby Brainz".

Mombies unite! You know what I'm talking about. We're the women behind you in line at the grocery store with the frazzled looks in their sleep deprived eyes. The ones you try to talk to but notice her eyes glazing over mid sentence. The ladies who seem to be set on repeat as all you get is, "oh, we're great, she was just up every hour or two for the past couple nights. Other than that things are wonderful". mmm hmmm. We know we're not fooling anyone. We do know, we're quickly transforming into Mombies. It's only a matter of time.

As I sit here, with my third cup of coffee, Penelope is sprawled across my lap snoozing contentedly. If only I could go back to sleep with her. Why is it once I cave and realize I'm not going back to bed and give in and drink coffee she falls asleep? This has conspiracy written all over it. 

She's been up every night for the past week EVERY two hours. It's like we've got a newborn again. I've actually started reading The Baby Whisperer. The Baby Whisperer!! What's up with the 6m no sleep phase? She wakes up and won't go back down without boob. There's got to be something else besides twisting my body like a circus performer to get her to settle again.

The only thing we can figure is that she is seriously teething. Bumps come up, bumps go down. She hasn't cut any teeth yet, but the drool is there. The chewing on everything like she's a basset hound is happening. The biting my nipple has become a favorite past time (&*@#!) and she is sucking in her bottom lip like a horse chewing on hay. But still no teeth.

At 1, 3 and 5am there are moments where I just can't deal and plant my face firmly into the pillow for a moment's scream. Or, I conveniently have to pee and get J to pick her up and bounce her until I can come give her the boob. Taking that time on the toilet to just sit for a minute and breathe. I know, it's a weird spot to breathe ujjaya style but some nights it just needs to be done.

The lack of sleep's starting to take it's toll. Through the day my patience wears thin so much faster. Why won't she stop grabbing at everything? What's with the mini screeches every so often? Must you fling food across the room? Yes, I know... because she's a baby! I get to this point where I'm not sure what to do in order to function properly until she gets past this stage...

... then she wakes up from her nap, opens her eyes and looks around. Her eyes settle on my face and she gives this massive (still) toothless grin, just for me, and I'm putty - knowing I'll put up with anything for her. And trusting in all the parents that have done this before me, that it will get better.

bluring the gender lines

We bought long sleeve sets a little while ago at Old Navy - a red set and a teal set - hey why not? They were 40% off. Turns out that sale was only on "girls" clothing. What makes a threesome of onesies "boys" or "girls"? Boys don't wear red or stripes? Girls don't like teal or dinosaurs?

I don't even know where to start the rant, so I'll just say I truly hope we are raising a generation of kids who will blur the ridiculous gender lines, boys marching proud in their polka dots and girls in their camo.

nb: funny what happens when you strike up a conversation about this with someone else in the kid's section and it turns out to be a manager. We got the dinosaurs at sale price ;)

Beware the Jolly Jumper

So my girl loves her Jolly Jumper. 

We've had no problems with it, until yesterday. I try to do 10 curls (biceps) with Penelope in the jumper before I attach her. Well, what happens as I carry her over to the spring in the middle of our door frame? At number 7 she falls to the right a bit... because one of the cords broke. It just snapped. Thankfully there are about 4 other safety mechanisms and 3 other straps with a JJ but SHIT! Could you imagine if that happened while she was jumping?

Hello baby's head, meet the floor!

Advice to parents, check the four straps that hold the seat to the bar on a regular basis, especially if you buy one second hand. My heart is only just starting to think about beating again.

Cue the Dolly Parton

Although I did have my first "girls night out" NYE, and not nursing for 12 hours seriously caused the twins to quadruple in size (Jared was thrilled), this isn't another blog post about my boobs.

 

I cue the Dolly Parton because my world is about to change. Again. I'll be the first to admit, I've been super spoiled. J only worked out of the house part time during the house renovations and through Penelope's first 5 months. I am so grateful and appreciative to have had such a long period to adjust to being a mom and I am in awe of the women I know who are taking care of their kids without a ton of help from their partners. I have an incredibly supportive one. Even if he doesn't always "get it". What ones really do? *wink

Now that he's gone and gotten himself a 9 to 5, I realize I am about to lose my baby breaks. I've got another 6 months to go before mat leave is over and I have to admit, I'm a little nervous. I have an incredible partner. He's come to the doctor's appointments with me, taken her for an hour so I could go to a yoga class or to the pool and played and read with her so I could take a nice long bath, make a meal or write.

I have become so accustomed to being able to pass her off for 5 minutes to catch my breath when her fussy time gets the best of me. Will I be able to handle being with Penelope for 8 hours a day alone? Will I become one of those moms with the crazed out look in her eyes accompanied by wicked mom hair because I've lost my shower time during the day? 

Oh. My. Gods. Will we be reduced to eating food out of a box or a can? Will I end up sneaking cocktails through the day or pouring vodka on my cereal?

Tomorrow is day one so I guess we'll just see how it goes...